Sunday, August 11, 2013

fighting the good fight

Depression sucks.
That could be my whole post. Ha
Man, I hit a wall last night and it may have fallen on me because I was completely useless today.  I've been listening to some really good teaching on how God loves us and wants all these good things for us (vs. the typical God is angry with you because you screwed up...again, though I find that most of today's churches actually have a pretty good spin on that so you don't necessarily realize you are feeling condemned).  I was angry and sad and angry and did I mention sad?  I hid in my room all day and grouched at my kids and then realized that this is super self destructive and I have to snap out of it because I do have a job and need to go to work tomorrow. 
Work is usually a good place to be because they keep me busy.
However, the next two months will be a series of events focused on cleaning the office and throwing things away and while I can intellectually appreciate how good that process is, I feel condemned by it and it makes me angry and... frustrated and generally puts me in a bad mood.  So I have to work extra hard to keep myself behaving appropriately.  They generally don't care for people being grouchy.  Especially not me because I'm generally not.

OK, this was a useless post.  I'm going to go back to watching TV now.  Thanks for listening.
Say goodnight Gracie.

Goodnight Gracie.

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