Thursday, November 29, 2012

how to cook

One of my coworkers was talking about how she couldn't melt chocolate without burning it and would like to learn how to cook.  I put this together for her and realized, I know more about it than I thought. 

Computer is still being fixed so this will be short.

Here is a good place to start.  Honestly, just reading about how to cook, you gain a lot of info.  http://www.wikihow.com/Cook
A good cookbook -- or several -- is important.
I have the traditional standby by Betty Crocker (for that I seriously double all the spices, but that was after learning how to make things from it).
Silver Palate Cookbooks really kick things up in taste and variety.  A friend gave me their cookbook as a gift and it's a much better option once you have a bit more comfort.
Another tip:  WRITE IN YOUR COOKBOOK.  Did it come out OK?  Did you drop an ingredient you don't care for?  Make notes so you know what you liked or didn't like for next time.

Spice Charts:  (I used these for a long time, and could probably stand an update.  Helped me learn what to use for what and together)
Find a website you like with recipes or come up with things you like to eat and I am willing to help you.  There are lots of short cuts you can learn.

Things I've learned over the years:
  • Don't leave the kitchen.  the fastest way for dinner to be ruined in my home is for me to walk out of the kitchen.  I now bring my tablet in to half watch something or I listen to the radio or a podcast.
  • Read the entire recipe all the way through and make sure you understand it all
  • Have all ingredients ready before starting (ex:  chopped, washed, measured)
  • Don't cook everything on high (I know it seems faster, but it cooks food uneven and often burns food)
  • Remember that food continues to cook after you remove it from the heat.  Especially important in baking.
  • Always let meat "rest" before cutting it (10 mins, to allow the juice to reabsorb)
  • Start with only what the recipe calls for. (as you learn how to cook and what you like, you can change things up, but you don't want to "break" the rules until you understand them. 
  • Baking is chemistry.  What you use is important.  There is a balance of oil, sugar, flour, etc.  And know that baking soda and baking powder are not the same thing!
  • Most cookbooks have a "how to" section.  Read it.  They actually know what they are talking about.  (imagine that!)
  • Have at least one good sharp knife.  Know how to use it.
  • Personally, I don't cook using much oil, I prefer cooking spray just because it cuts on the grease.

Thursday, November 8, 2012

computer virus edition: $1m vacuum?

Go to www.Google.com
Type in "million dollar vacuum"
Choose a link.
Laugh with me.


Or to save time... click here.

I was going to say... man, that thing better be made of GOLD... but, well, it is. 

Thursday, October 25, 2012

computer virus edition: stuff you didn't know you need

My computer has been very ill for a very long time and while I plot the evil demise of all who write and distribute computer viruses (oh and try to figure out how to pay for fixing my computer), I will quickly post this...

Stuff You Didn't Know You Need

Merry KISSmas?

KISS Christmas Lights

KISS Nutcracker

Starboot Stocking

Dragonboot Stocking

Should these be items you desperately need for your Christmas (or Hanukkah) Shopping...
here is the link

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

computer virus imposed "vacation"

My computer has been very ill for a very long time and while I plot the evil demise of all who write and distribute computer viruses (oh and try to figure out how to pay for fixing my computer), I will quickly post this...

Most Inappropriate Pumpkin Carving

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

oh no, not boys!

As a parent, there are a lot of areas that you know are coming and part of you want to prepare to do everything perfectly.  To be calm and collected, to know your stand is solid regardless of the emotional madness that will be send your way should said offspring choose to disagree with you.  Listen to that part of you.  Prepare.  Read, talk with other parents, pray.  Then sit back and practice some laughing because there will always be a little fun thrown into the mix and a sense of humor is often the only thing standing between your kids and a future jail sentence for you.

I hit this danger zone many (many) times with my son (going into High School this year).  He is a precocious child (meaning he thinks he's smarter than me -- sometimes he even is, plus he has more energy than me and can often just out wait me to win.  We have our battles, but we have some good discussions along the way.  Discussions I often walk away from with the understanding that I should write about that dialog there and by the next morning I find myself wondering if I've just been played by a boy who knows what I want to hear and knows that is the easiest way to end the conversation.  Hmmm.

My daughter is the newest danger zone.  It just -poof- happened the past few weeks of this summer.  A few jr high nights at school, a few community pool parties and suddenly my 12 year old is texting more boys that I even know!  She mature physically, has a good head on her shoulders for the most part.  I have seen her take a stand on things she was passionate about and walk away from friends who were behaving poorly.  So this isn't just a snotty, pms'ing, I wanna grow up and do all that fun stuff -- without my parents around -- girl. But she is talking to that girl inside of her and I find myself wanting to do anything to stop the conversation.  

I like that I can trust my daughter.
I like that basically she's always been a good girl.  (granted, she hates to do her chores, but that and some mouthing off have been the worst of our issues until now.)
Now, she has boys wanting to go to the movies, and buy her candy and drinks. Now she has them texting her ad nausea.  When they are together in groups, the boys are high-fiving each other that my daughter and her trusty friend "M" are hanging out with one boy they saw at the park and talking.  (I mean, why can't they just be seen as hanging out because the live near the park and happened to run into one another??  Why does it have to be characterized as the boy "picked up 2 babes and hey, way to go dude."  (do kids still say dude?  I still hear it, but I'm sure they will accuse me of being way out of date for having that in here.)

So, Mommy is freaking out.  Daddy isn't happy but seems to have it under control.

Some new guidelines...
No boys without a group (3 or more) and a chaperon over 18 (with some standards of behavior agreed to).
(Oh, the perfect chaperon just came to mind! -- insert evil parental smile!)
No boys alone (obviously).
Reiteration that texts are not private and will be read randomly.  (note to parents:  you can learn a lot with this one)

I'm also rethinking the Burka.  Maybe I was hasty in shunning the idea of it's repressive nature.  Perhaps they just want to keep their women safe!  I wonder if they come in other colors/patterns.  (wink)




Tuesday, September 11, 2012

making good decisions

I talk a lot with my kids about "who do you want to be when you grow up" and by that I mean, what kind of person?  What kind of things do you want in your life?

  • Relationships?
  • Opportunities?
  • Employment?
We are failing if we are just living our lives without being intention in the decisions we make.  Sitting on the sofa watching tv all week is a decision; albeit a passive one.  The problem is often that it doesn't feel like a decision.  It feels like I'm just relaxing.  That particular relaxation is seductive.  Who knew my TV was such a vixen of negative productivity and an ever increasing back side.  (remember that Kaiser Permanente commercial that talked about this?  http://xnet.kp.org/newscenter/aboutkp/ourads.html)  Actually most of their ads are really good!

 

Good decisions start with stop




Monday, August 20, 2012

I'll do anything...

"I'll do anything to lose weight...
Except eat right and exercise."

yup... pretty much sums it up.

Friday, August 17, 2012

humor and weightloss

IM from today....

me:  I think my mantra this week should be NO COOKIES

K:  that's doable
K:  remember: attainable goals

me:  I'm not even hungry but those crack cookies are down there SINGING TO ME
me:  wooing me
me:  calling me
me:  they have to be one of the best cookies ever

K: My sis likes the deep fried cakes of EVIL

me:  that's what they are, deep fried cakes of EVIL

K:  think of the cookies as the EVIL brother to the donuts
K:  only baked

me:  I used to not ever have them (deep fried cakes of EVIL), then slowly started partaking them again

K:  not too big on the EVIL death cakes

me:  same with french fries
me:  though I find those easier to have just a few and stop

K:  and they are soooo tasty
K:  EVIL deep fried potato sticks

me:  I'd honestly rather have "sweet potato's" (quotes because they are really yams.  Yams = orange, sweet potato's = white, slightly yellow)

K:  silly

me:  COOKIES SHUT UP!!!!

...later...

K:  are you working late tonight?

me:  what cookies?
me:  honest, I walked by and they JUMPED into my mouth
me:  chased me even
me:  Horror Movie Cookies

K:  you are a baaaad girl
K:  just remember, everyone usually dies in horror movies.

stupid deep fried EVIL's baked brother

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

7 hour adventure

If cursing is offensive to you, I recommend you read the disclaimer at the end first.  Just for the record, it's not my cursing... it's on another blog I link to.  I'd hate for you to be offended.

If you don't know why going to see Jenny Lawson is terribly important, you might want to start here.


If you understand why I did this... then please keep reading.

I went on an adventure Tuesday night.  The excitement began inside me when I decided to go and just built until I arrived.  I love stuff like this!  I only wish a couple of my friends could have joined me!

I got to work early so I could leave early so I could drive home to pick up my kids and drive to San Diego (from Orange County and not the southern end of the OC!).  Our adventure lasted 7 hours and cost me WAY too much money!  (way way too much money)

I had it all worked out.  Leaving early from work I could miss most of the traffic, we'd listen to a book on tape to make our journey more pleasant (and hopefully avoid fighting over different music tastes and my desire to listen to NPR which my (woefully uneducated) children find boring).  However, I left the cassette converter thingy in my husband's car and while I planned to use a mini speaker I recently purchased, I learned that even with the speaker at top volume... a Kindle just does not want to be loud enough for 4 people to listen to it in a car while moving.

So the book on tape was abandoned.  Which seemed sad to me because I actually had to argue with my kids to listen to it in the first place and having finally convinced them; I now had no satisfaction in their enjoyment doing something they initially didn't want to do.  (Mom's are like that.)

We drove.  The kids complained about being hungry and commented on each potential eating establishment as we drove down the freeway at breakneck speeds (all our necks are fine thank you).  We missed all the OC traffic (probably because I wasn't willing to feed my poor children (hey!  I told them to have a sandwich before I got home!).  Made it half way down the 78 and slowed to about 20mph.  JOY.  We started reading Jenny's book...we started laughing and my driving became more erratic.

Wow... I wrote that much and we haven't even met Jenny yet!  OK, I'll speed this up.


After stopping for gas (because my readout that tells me how many miles I can drive on the gas in my car went from 2 to 0 about 10 miles away from our destination) we finally arrived at the Barnes & Noble in Mira Mesa at 5:55pm.  Having read other blog posts about the crowds, I knew it was going to be busy! Alas, there were no more chairs left and even the open space around the chairs was quickly filling up.  I ran to buy the book (gasp, choke-- who knew a hardback book cost THAT much?  I'm an e-book girl all the way!) and ran back to secure my place in the crowd.  (Kids hung out in the car for a bit)

I met some great people and we all had a lot of fun hanging out.  One of those people was Melanie who kindly took pictures and shared them with me.  She also writes about the event on her blog here.

My favorite picture is this one...
My daughter looks so pretty and creepy holding and petting the chicken while the rest of us discuss what twine is and why it's important.

I think we overwhelmed the bookstore.  Apparently the last time they saw a crowd like this Ozzy Osborne was there.  We completely overwhelmed the A/C!  I mean girl, it was HOT in there!  We stood, we sat, we took pictures, we waited.  My kids brought the metal chickens in to be autographed and I was surprised to see I wasn't the only metal chicken bearer.  
Chicken Brigade... added humor, the redhead in the striped shirt is *afraid of chickens*
Then Jenny arrived.  I think the only thing that kept us from mobbing Jenny and  giving her the biggest group hug she's ever had is our knowledge of her anxiety and crowd issues.  We clapped and they worked out the microphone, then she warned everyone that she was about to say F*** a lot and started reading a chapter from her book.  (a particular favorite of mine about ExLax)  We howled with laughter.  

Q&A time - best question goes to the man in the back.  "Jenny, is there anything I can do to dissuade my wife from buying a stuffed moose?"

Jenny:  No.

Ha!  She said more, but the crowd egged them on and agreed she needed the moose.  In fact, Jenny said, "Who wouldn't want a moose?!"

The line for autographs was loooong and I was super grateful to be at about the halfway point.  I think the line winded through most of the store (I couldn't actually see because I'm vertically challenged).  I thought a bunch of people had gone home and said as much when I was corrected by a taller person who saw the truth.

I had books and chickens signed while confessing my concern for being voted "worst parent" for bringing my children along to meet her.  Jenny assured me they were old enough for me to avoid such a title.
See Jenny's hand there signing the book! 

My daughter is still holding the chickens!

Some of those items signed are gifts to friends.  I'm so looking forward to the giving of said gifts!!  It really is the best thing to share laughter!!

I think that's what I love about Jenny so much.  She takes all the events in her life and finds a way to laugh about it.  Maybe not immediately, but the laughter is there to find.  

Thanks for letting us laugh along with you Jenny!

Thanks for introducing me to Jenny, Kathy!  I can never repay you!


Disclaimer:  I do not curse in this post (or really in this blog).  However, I am a fan of certain blogs and some do curse.  The nature of myself and the internet leads to many links and I would hate for you to not realize what you're getting yourself into.  Specifically here, The Bloggess curses a fair bit.  It's not the backbone of her humor (as some comedians use it) but it is liberally sprinkled throughout her site.  She is still hilarious and one of a few must read blogs on my list.  But I appreciate it isn't everyone's cup of tea.  

Bloggess Indoctrination


If cursing is offensive to you, I recommend you read the disclaimer at the end first.  Just for the record, it's not my cursing... it's on another blog I link to.  I'd hate for you to be offended.

This is my Indoctrination for other blog posts I've written.  It seemed easier to do a separate post since r others, you do indeed require indoctrinating.

Note:  I really do more than just re-post Jenny's blogs.  But she's so awesome, how can I not share!!!

The indoctrination begins here...(click the towels)

continues when you buy and read this... (click the book)

and ends when this makes sense to you... 
(you can click if you want, but it's probably just what you thought it was.  A stuffed baby black unicorn.)

You're welcome!
P.S.  If by change you missed it, this is seriously worth reading.
as is this


Disclaimer:  I do not curse in this post (or really in this blog).  However, I am a fan of certain blogs and they do curse.  The nature of myself and the internet leads to many links and I would hate for you to not realize what you're getting yourself into.  Specifically here, The Bloggess curses a fair bit.  It's not the backbone of her humor (as some comedians use it) but it is liberally sprinkled throughout her site.  She is still hilarious and one of a few must read blogs on my list.  But I appreciate it isn't everyone's cup of tea.  

OMG Beyonce!


If cursing is offensive to you, I recommend you read the disclaimer at the end first.  Just for the record, it's not my cursing... it's on another blog I link to.  I'd hate for you to be offended.


My children are just unflappable!  I love that my loudness and fondness for making a spectacle of myself doesn't often bother them too much and that occassionally they even enjoy it!

Last week, I went shopping with my daughter for some things my daughter needed and we found ourselves at Ross.  We didn't find what we needed, but we did find THESE!!!

We rounded a corner and I saw them, standing on the shelf at eye level!  I exclaimed!
It's Beyonce!

I was completely entranced in my own little world of chickens and failed to notice that I started several people (causing one to jump) and created a small stir as people frantically looked around to see where Beyonce*was!  (I can only assume they were thinking of the singer).  

I ran up to her and pulled her off the shelf then hugged her for the preciousness she is.

Then I spotted a second chicken!

There are TWO!  I can have one too! 
(you will note that I spelled both two/too's correctly)

I debated the wisdom in spending $40 on metal chickens and tried to restrain myself by taking just one from the shelf.  I walked around blissfully happy for I've been looking for an apartment sized Beyonce for about a year.  

I made my way to the checkout and just as it was my turn, I pushed my daughter out of line to go get the other Beyonce QUICK!

I was next.  I told the young woman (oh man, did I just say that?) at the checkout that she needed to charge me for two of these as my daughter went back to get the other one.  

Checkout girl:  You really like chickens, eh?

Me:  Actually, I don't, but I love this one.  It's a long story, but a good one.  You need to go check it out on line.  (I then proceeded to tell her about The Bloggess and she was interested enough to take extra receipt paper from the till and write it down!  My chicken love must have been contagious!)

I cannot wait to give the other chicken away!  

The best part of this story is listening to my daughter tell it to others!  Thanks for being you Hannah and appreciating me!


Disclaimer:  I do not curse in this post (or really in this blog).  However, I am a fan of certain blogs and they do curse.  The nature of myself and the internet leads to many links and I would hate for you to not realize what you're getting yourself into.  Specifically here, The Bloggess curses a fair bit.  It's not the backbone of her humor (as some comedians use it) but it is liberally sprinkled throughout her site.  She is still hilarious and one of a few must read blogs on my list.  But I appreciate it isn't everyone's cup of tea.  

Friday, August 10, 2012

binder clips

There is a story behind why this is SO great to me!
The admin who had my position before I did was a hoarder.  She hoarded office supplies in a big way.  Our division went through a huge spring cleaning and we managed to divest ourselves of 40 filing cabinets!!  As we went through them, we kept finding stashes of office supplies; often locked.  There was a filing cabinet with one drawer full of pens -- all of them so old, they didn't work anymore and they had never been used!  They just dried out.

I think in all we found like 7 filing cabinets of office supplies.  The best one was a lateral file drawer FULL of  binder clips!  All the same size, most of them grouped and put into sandwich bags with 5 little boxes in each bag.  I stood there for minutes.  I took a picture (which I sadly cannot find because I would truly love to share this with you).  I just couldn't for the life of me imagine an instance when one would need to purchase so many binderclips!  What possible eventuality would one plan for to have so many hundreds of binder clips?  It's not like they are going to be useful in a Zombie Apocolopyse or something important like that!

A coworker, whom I shared this story, just sent me this and I so enjoyed looking through it.

I hope you do too!


http://www.buzzfeed.com/kevindanger/54-uses-for-binder-clips-that-will-change-your-lif-555z

The cleverness of humanity always delights me!

Monday, August 6, 2012

hysteria

Um.... really?
This was an uncontroversial treatment?

An article about the Top 10 Controversial Psychiatric Disorders
One being:  Hysteria
In the Victorian era, hysteria was a catch-all diagnosis for women in distress. The symptoms were vague (discontentment, weakness, outbursts of emotion, nerves) and the history sexist (Plato blamed the wanderings of an "unfruitful" uterus).

The treatment for hysteria? "Hysterical paroxysm," also known as orgasm. Physicians would massage their patients' genitals either manually or with a vibrator, a task they found tedious but surprisingly uncontroversial. More contentious was the practice of putting "hysterical" women on bed rest or demanding that they not work or socialize, a treatment that often worsened anxiety or depression.

According to a 2002 editorial in the journal Spinal Cord, the diagnosis of hysteria gradually petered out throughout the 20th century. By 1980, hysteria disappeared from the DSM in favor of newer diagnoses like conversion and dissociative disorders.
Thank you once again Internet for giving me a laugh.

Thursday, August 2, 2012

why I love the internet

There is a website for just about everything out there!
Case in point...

I am fat and I want to cut my hair shorter.  EVERYONE loves long hair.  So getting opinions on this is difficult because the standard response is "don't cut your hair."

So.... I decided to do what I do for most things.  I asked Google.

http://www.fatgirlsguidetoliving.com/2010/05/20/the-fat-girls-guide-to-flattering-hair-cuts-for-round-faces/

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

strange day

today, in here it was nuts.  So many people are having problems and so far it's not me personally (well not entirely, I'll get back to that later.)  But I care about the people around me.  I listen, I try to help and try to avoid "solving" because you know that just leads to a bad place.


So I'm laughing at some things on YouTube and came acrross this.  Thought I'd share.


http://youtu.be/r5R8gSgedh4

The comments had me just dyingl


Inline image 5
 
Bridgette
count it all joy...

Monday, July 30, 2012

teaching history

Interesting article/show...

http://www.npr.org/2012/07/30/157604072/ever-growing-past-confounds-history-teachersI especially love the idea of tossing out the books to teach history in a way that really draws the student in and helps them understand WHY IT MATTERS instead of memorizing a bunch of facts; which in my book isn't learning.



I feel strongly about my kids (and myself) learning not just the facts, but the reasons why those facts are important.  Honestly, I went to school in one of the  best districts in the state and remember so little of what was taught to me.  The things I really remember are those that the teacher helped me UNDERSTAND!  I still remember the short story The Bet and my teacher telling me "it wretches me" as she described the issues in the story and what they really meant.  This ability to read and understand is highly under-developed in our world today.  I sincerely doubt we can point to any one reason why, thought I'm sure the technological revolution has something to do with it.  The short attention spans and the idea that within a few clicks on a keyboard, I  can know anything.  (I admit, I'm guilty here.)  However, I had a mom who felt it was important I understand how to have a discussion, how to reason. I ran with it and turned into what I now realize was a really obnoxious teen.  I was so sure I was right about everything because I read and thought I understood.  Add that knowledge to being a teen who already thinks we are unstoppable and you can imagine how I behaved.  (I'll give you a hint, there were a number of lunch tables that served as my soap box).  Fun times!


Do you know how to reason?  To think an idea through and know if it is logical and sound?  If not, this is something you should seriously consider adding to your "to do" list.  




And if you missed it in the link above:  http://histsociety.blogspot.com/2012/05/when-is-it-time-to-stop-teaching.html

Saturday, July 21, 2012

stuff that should exist

I have been an admin for a long time.  Most of my adult life in fact.  I actually like doing this kind of work so I'm not complaining.  There are some things about this kind of work that can be frustrating.  There aren't any jobs without this I know.  One of the things that can cause difficulties is keeping my boss on schedule.  


Many years ago, at the cusp of the electronic revolution -- we're talking when alpha-numeric pagers were the thing to have; I came up with what I thought then, and still think today would have a really great market.


I introduce to you...
The Executive Pager/Cattle Prod


The idea is that only the admin has the code to make the cattle prod part work. You put the code in and zap!!  Time to go to that next meeting boss man!

I'm working on specs now.  I'm pretty sure I could write an app for this and secretly load it on smart phones. :)